Saturday, July 24, 2010

Sigh! That's All I Can Do!

Baby is still with us. Somehow she is still hanging on. One day I am ready to dig her grave, and the next day she is out and about. Thursday I took one look at her and decided that that was THE DAY! I cried and moped around and acted awful all day. I ate junk food or anything I could get my hands on. Just emotional eating.

I got dressed and went to the knit group. I ordered a batch of Hugo's macho nachos, and shared them with Colleen. After about an hour and a half, I had to go home.

When I walked in the door, Baby was out from under the bed and waiting in the kitchen. She meowed. I tried to feed her some things, but she just turned up her nose. I finally drained as much juice as I could from one of the cans of cat food, and she ate about a tsp or so of that.

Friday morning she is outside sitting in the flower bed. About 9 am I decided it was just too hot for her to be out in the sun. I fixed her another batch of juice from the can, and she ate that. I couldn't get her to drink any water, so I opened a can of tuna fish and drained the water from that. She drank about a tsp of that, so some fluids anyway.

She stayed under the bed all day, and was really wobbly when she tried to walk. I am thinking, How is she managing all this? She would not eat a thing after the morning round.

This morning she was sitting under her favorite tree and watched Patty and me walk around the yard. I came into the kitchen and decided to try the juice from the can thing, and I turn around and there she is standing in the kitchen doorway meowing!

Today she is eating a lot. I have gone through two cans of food draining the juice out. A while ago she actually ate some of the food. Not much, but a little bit. I squirted two ccs of water into her mouth this morning after she ate the first time. I ate a grilled cheese sandwich on raisin bread for lunch. She actually ate some of the melted cheese. Cheese is her favorite people food, but she hasn't eaten any of that for over a week.

So today I have been listening to podcasts and finishing the second single ply of the bison/alpaca blend. I finally gave up trying to make a pretty yarn. The bison is so nubbly. It just makes these little pill-y things, and I can't make a smooth, pretty yarn. Once I gave up on that, it has been so much easier to complete. Tomorrow I will get right onto plying the two singles and be done with that mess.

Then I think I want to spin something pretty and fun and just joyful. Something that will not be a chore to do like this one has been.

I knit some more on the linen stitch scarf. I finished a pair of itty-bitty socks for someone's baby. I don't know who's baby, but they are cute. I am really close to being done with the granny square crocheted afghan. Once I decided to quit when it is big enough for a baby, it became a do-able project. Our minds are a wonderful thing-aren't they? I need to get busy with some dyeing, but it is so blasted hot.

A while ago when I walked out to the mailbox and let Patty out for a little walk, I think it became clear there are two times of year that are not pleasant to be outside. One is in dead winter and it is really cold and windy and gray. And it doesn't ever warm up during the daytime.

The other time is now, when it is really, really hot, and the heat index is hovering around 110 degrees. The humidity actually makes it hard to breathe. I can't enjoy gardening, or mowing, or doing anything outside.

So my time right now has been hovering around poor little Baby, trying to make sure she is cared for, and going through some grieving time. I felt super guilty yesterday when I ran to the store to get more cat food. The clerk was telling me her youngest son starts school in two weeks! I just couldn't believe that kids have to go to school in this heat and so early. She was showing me the list of school supplies they have to have, and it is so amazing to me! She has been trying to find sales and places to get this stuff at the best price, because she just doesn't have the money. It puts my grieving and carrying on in a different perspective, and I felt so guilty driving home.

So have a safe rest of the weekend. Stay cool and keep on knitting. Christmas is around the corner.

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